He walks into a bar with a terribly worried look on his face, and when the bartender approaches him, he says "Pour me a stiff one! Man, have I got big trouble!"

When the bartender, or any other sympathetic person nearby asks what's wrong, he continues:

"Year before last, I was at this party, and I struck up a conversation with this woman. We had a couple drinks together, and were hitting it off really well, and, well... we ended up... having our own little party, if you know what I mean... "

"Well, we didn't see each other again after that, and... I didn't even remember her name... "

"Today, I get this letter from her lawyer telling me that she had my CHILD about a year ago... She sent me this picture... "

He pulls a wallet-sized photo out of his billfold, and showing it, says, "Hell, I don't think it even LOOKS like me... "